Member-only story
Writing Tip #11: Remove Narrative Distance
A writing tip a day every day in 2025
Removing narrative distance helps your story feel more immersive. This, in turn will make readers feel like they connect better with your characters and make your settings feel more rich and lush. And it’s super easy to do.
Go through your manuscript and look for any word that puts distance between your character and the experience they’re having.
Jane saw the monster coming from the dark forest.
vs
The monster burst from the dark forest, running straight for Jane.
Harry felt the rain on his skin.
vs
Cool rain ran down Harry’s skin.
Remove saw, felt, heard, tasted, smelled, realized, and all conjugations or synonyms for those verbs.
(here’s where I add the caveat that of course there will be times when narrative distance can be deployed strategically; that’s not what we’re talking about today)
(and also, these words might show up in some form that is not narrative distance; know thyself.)
Remove those verbs and rephrase the sentence to make it feel more immersive, more immediate.
Narrative distance puts space between your character and their experience which also put distance between your reader and the character’s experience, making them feel too far removed from the action or the emotions on the page.
Gina Denny is an author, editor, and publishing professional. She helps you make your writing better. Long videos available on YouTube. Shorter ones on Instagram. Both on TikTok (for now). Office hours, podcast episodes, and hour-long classes available on Patreon.